Another Monday night means another edition of The Final Drive! I’m going to skip right past the Thanksgiving Day games as we all saw what happened. (Right?) Lots going on in week 12, including another QB injury in Houston and more magic from Jebus and Teebs.
(6-5) Tennessee Titans 23
(4-7) Tampa Bay Buccaneers 17
Hey… Chris Johnson showed up to the 2011 NFL season. Welcome.
(6-5) New York Jets 28
(5-6) Buffalo Bills 24
Completely overshadowed by his idiotic celebration and dropped touchdown is the fact that Stevie Johnson made Revis Island look like a vacation. He consistently beat Revis in one-on-one match-ups, but that wasn’t enough for the Bills to avoid dropping their fourth straight.
(8-3) Houston Texans 20
(3-8) Jacksonville Jaguars 13
I don’t care so much about this result, since the Jags are pretty terrible. But Matt Leinart broke his collarbone, effectively ending his season and leaving T.J. Yates in charge of this playoff-bound squad. That has to be a frightening thought for Texan fans. I was really looking forward to Leinart and his porn’ ‘stache.
(8-3) New England Patriots 38
(4-7) Philadelphia Eagles 20
YEAH ROY!!! I’m done with the Eagles now. Absolutely positively done. The Patriots manned up and finished off a team I thought was done four weeks ago. They’re streaking to a division title while the Eagles are plummeting down towards a likely coaching change. Inconsistent defense, a whiny wide receiver, and key injuries have all contributed to the Eagle downfall.
(6-5) Denver Broncos 16
(4-7) San Diego Chargers 13
Speaking of coaching changes, the Chargers are due. Norv Turner’s been wasting “the most talent in the NFL” for years and this year is one of the worst. There’s no miraculous stretch run in this team. On the other sideline… forget it. I don’t even want to talk about him. (Besides to mention his nickname is now “Jebus and Teebs.”
(8-3) Pittsburgh Steelers 13
(4-7) Kansas City Chiefs 9
I’m stunned that the Chiefs were only down four… with two minutes to go… and a chance to win… with Tyler “Warming the Seat for Kyle Orton” Palko. The Steelers got the win and that’s what counts, but credit that KC defense for reaching down and giving one helluva performance Sunday night.
(8-3) New Orleans Saints 49
(6-5) New York Giants 24
Well that fizzled. I was hoping for a little more of a fight from a Giants team on the precipice, but instead they came out flat and laid down against the Saints’ offensive machine. It was fun to see the Saints go off, but this wasn’t even close to being competitive. The Giants are too inconsistent to make the playoffs.
That’s it for another week of NFL action. Only five more to go! Be back next week for more swearing and mediocre analysis!
