The Opening Drive: Week 17, 2011-12

I’ll bet you thought week 17 in the NFL was meaningless! Well I call shenanigans on that premise entirely, as I’m ready to touch on ELEVEN games going on New Year’s Day. How’s THAT for an Opening Drive?

 

(10-5) Detroit Lions at
(14-1) Green Bay Packers

We pretty much know the story here. Detroit wants like hell to avoid losing and dropping to the sixth seed in the NFC, because that would mean a trip to New Orleans in the wild card round and a quick trip back home after a swift kick in the ass from Drew Brees and company. Green Bay has absolutely nothing to play for, so they’ll likely sit Rodgers and any banged up skill players early. Lions should win this one.

St. Louis is primed to snatch the number one draft pick away from Indy with another loss, meaning they’ll be the subject of so many “Should they draft Andrew Luck or trade (incumbent starter)” questions throughout the offseason. Seriously though, getting the number one pick twice in a span of only three seasons? Ouch.

There’s some mild playoff implications for the Jets here if they win and get a whole bunch of other (better) teams to lose on Sunday. Unfortunately, they probably won’t get past the whole “winning” thing on their own. Miami is one of those better teams.

Why am I writing about this game again? Oh yeah, because Brady and company are going to have one of their typical “We’re not resting anyone and we’re going to rack up points like our playoff seeding depended on it” kind of games. (Did you know points scored is like, the fifth or sixth tiebreaker for playoff seeding? I’d play that card every time I wanted to rack up points on someone.)

Just to make sure Brady doesn’t pass Brees for the yardage record, don’t be surprised to see Sean Payton let his quarterback loose with some high-percentage throws to Darren Sproles (also going for a record) so he can rack up yards and steady his completion percentage, a record which he is also chasing. Sorry Carolina, you were a good story, but that defense is about to get LIT UP. Again.

What the hell? We’ve gone from never thinking the Colts would ever win a freaking game to having them as the overwhelming underdog favorite against the Jags? Eff. Poor Jacksonville. They get no respect.

Yet another game with possible playoff implications. The Titans need some help, but they can squeak in with some help from above. Houston might not have much to play for, but they still need to get Andre Johnson and T.J. Yates some actual game reps before any playoff run can be mounted. Heh. “Mounted.”

A legitimately intriguing match-up, the Ravens can lock down a first-round bye and the division title with a win or slip to the five seed with a loss and a Steelers win. The Bengals are the front-runners to get into the playoffs at the six slot, needing only to win and they’re in. Lotta stakes in this one.

Screw Tim Tebow. I don’t care if the Broncos can win their division. They’re almost as quick a first-round out as Houston.

I’m only mentioning this game because the Raiders can still win the AFC West if the Broncos lose, meaning Teebs gets nowhere near my playoffs. Also interesting? If the Raiders win ONE playoff game this year, they have to give Cincy another first-round pick for Carson Palmer. HA!

Easily the simplest and most dire stakes of all the day’s action, who else can’t wait for this finishing act of the 2011 regular season? I might get misty at that idea, but it’ll be soon be overcome with the raw emotion this game will pry from me. This can honestly go any way. It could be a tight finish with a last-second score or one of these teams could get absolutely lambasted on national television. The Giants are inconsistent at best and the Cowboys can’t defend the pass. However, we’ve got two really good quarterbacks to draw our attention away from those minor flaws.

That’s it everyone! Have a fantastic finish to your 2011 NFL regular season!